I have spent a lot of time with members of the opposite sex. I have been in many relationships. I have been guilty of wrongdoings towards partners and I have been a victim of wrongdoings. I have tried to mend failed relationships and I have been hopeful when walking into new ones.
I would always in one way or the other place blame on why these relationships ended. I would mistakenly place blame.
There is only one reason why these past relationships ended and that is because I was with the wrong person. Simple as that. I had my plan about who I wanted to be with and who would make me happy. I thought I knew what I needed, I was wrong.
One night, after an extremely difficult day at work and a frustrating evening taking care of my two boys (back when I was a single father) I found myself sitting on the edge of my bed. My head felt like it weighed 50 pounds. I couldn’t hold it up. I dropped my head in my hands, in my room alone and cried.
In those moments, I came to the realization that no woman on this earth could provide me happiness. I recognized that my job, that my only job was to take care of God’s kids. Specifically in that moment, my two sons. I believed for the first time in their lives that the only Help I needed with that job was from God. I accepted that the possibility of me dying a single father was very real and for the first time I was completely okay with that.
I remember praying.
I remember talking with God and saying…
“I get it and I am ready. I will fight everything that crosses my path that could hurt my children. I will go to my grave and invest my last breath doing right for my kids. There is nothing and no one that will distract me from my job. If it God’s will that I die a single father, that is completely fine.”
And then I went to sleep.
It wasn’t long after that when I ran into Kelli. It wasn’t because I was chasing her or she was chasing me. It wasn’t a result of me hunting a partner. It was rooted in some mutual friends suggesting that she help me when I needed it most. It was rooted in her desire to help. It was rooted in my submission to God.
Kelli showed up, she helped, she cared for us…she loved on us. She did that with God in her heart. That love was the catalyst for a relationship that I could have never orchestrated no matter how hard I tried. That love was divinely influenced.
I am extremely fortunate for what I have in my life. I know that and I do not take that for granted. But the one thing that has constantly made me smile, even made me laugh to myself time and time again is how absolutely amazingly strategic God is. How He patiently waited for me to realize that my happiness comes from Him and Him alone and that no woman can on her own make me happy before He placed my wife in my path. My wife who has, with God’s help, provided me more happiness than every other female I have known or will ever know combined. I am so blessed to have her. We are so blessed to have God in our lives. Our home is so fortunate to be ran by God and every one of us is experiencing the rewards from that.
Our wedding vows clearly outlined and predicted all of this. The reason I was never content with other women was because they were the wrong ones. They were not the other half of my soul, only Kelli is that. We are one.
Genesis 2:24
24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.